Libertarians Nominate Hot New Candidate 'None Of These'
Category: SatireVia: gregtx • 2 weeks ago • 3 comments
U.S. — In a groundbreaking move, the Libertarian Party has announced their official nominee for the upcoming presidential election will be Nevada primary winner "None of these".
Officials gathered at the annual Libertarian Party convention, where they unveiled a bold new strategy to shake up the political landscape by nominating no one. "After careful consideration and countless debates, we have unanimously decided to have nobody lead our party," declared party chairman Jeff Guiles. "Nobody has an incredible track record of never interfering with the liberties we hold dear. When faced with all the other options for President, the clear option is 'None of these'!"
According to sources, there has been a massive surge in registered Libertarians after the announcement. "We believe no one will be a breath of fresh air in Washington," said one enthusiastic supporter. "No one will tax your income, infringe on your rights, or regulate your backyard barbecue. Vote N.O.T. 2024!"
At publishing time, updated polling found no one with a commanding lead over everyone.
Show your support for the best possible candidate for president and winner of the Nevada Republican Primary: None of These Candidates.