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Retired Dr. Fauci Called Out Of Retirement For One Last Mask Mandate

  

Category:  Satire

Via:  gregtx  •  10 months ago  •  25 comments

Retired Dr. Fauci Called Out Of Retirement For One Last Mask Mandate
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The greatest living hero of the COVID-19 pandemic has been reluctantly drawn back into battle, as the Biden administration has reportedly called retired authority on virology Dr. Anthony Fauci out of retirement for one last ride as it seeks to implement a new mask mandate.

S E E D E D   C O N T E N T


WASHINGTON, D.C. — The greatest living hero of the COVID-19 pandemic has been reluctantly drawn back into battle, as the Biden administration has reportedly called retired authority on virology Dr. Anthony Fauci out of retirement for one last ride as it seeks to implement a new mask mandate.

"I'm getting too old for this [stuff]," Dr. Fauci was heard muttering after hanging up the telephone at his D.C.-area residence. "One last ride. I didn't think I had it in me, but sometimes a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Now, let's go suppress some personal liberties and see how many lives we can destroy for old times' sake."

Government officials have begun warning the public about a new wave of COVID about to sweep through the population, despite President Biden declaring the pandemic "over" nearly a year ago. With public opinion that the country is headed in the wrong direction and another election year around the corner, leaders concluded that new lockdowns and mandates were necessary. "This is only a temporary measure," one White House source disclosed. "As soon as the election is over next fall, the next pandemic will subside, and we can let everyone have their freedoms back. We have a solemn duty to save the American people — and democracy itself — from COVID."

At publishing time, Dr. Fauci was rumored to be "rounding up the old gang" for what he was telling them would be "one last shot at killing as many people as possible."


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GregTx
Professor Guide
1  seeder  GregTx    10 months ago

original

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  GregTx @1    10 months ago

You can keep joking about mask mandates, or how the mandate is contrary to your holy personal rights and freedoms but at the same time not be concerned that there won't be enough emergency hospital beds for your loved ones.  I am still suffering from long-Covid and I'm lucky to still be alive at my age that I only caught an Omicron variant and not the original killer.  I still wear a N-95 mask whenever I go out.  Because I have no idea if I might still be contagious I absolutely will not take the chance of spreading the virus to anyone else, but I damn well don't want to catch any new variant that is happening.  [deleted]

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1.1    10 months ago
But then I'm not an ignorant arrogant person who thinks he's the best and most important person in the world.

Was that meant to be personal? Surely not....

Yeah I would probably be seriously concerned living in the country of origin as well....

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.2  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1.1    10 months ago

512

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1.3  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  GregTx @1.1.1    10 months ago

No, Greg.  Although I don't think it's something to joke about, my reference about arrogance was about the example I gave elsewhere about a man who was detained by police for NOT wearing a mask where it was mandated to do so in California, who started yelling about his "holy personal rights and freedoms", and you have to admit that there are a lot of anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers in America.  As for the country of origin, there was almost absolute control of the virus in Chongqing where I have been living during the zero Covid policy, and it didn't spread like wildfire until that policy was lifted, which is when I caught the Omicron variant.  

 
 
 
Greg Jones
Professor Participates
1.1.4  Greg Jones  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1.1    10 months ago

You must realize that mask doesn't protect you, or the people you come in contact with. 

Not even a little bit.

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1.5  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Greg Jones @1.1.4    10 months ago

LOL, a genuine anti-masker's comment.  If it's only 5% effective in protecting me I'm still damn well going to wear it, but it happens to be a LOT MORE EFFECTIVE to prevent my spreading the virus to others, and if it means I can protect others by wearing it then I'm damn well going to wear it because, Greg, I'm not a selfish ignorant asshole who doesn't give a shit about who he harms because, after all, personal rights and freedom.

Do you trust the Mayo Clinic?  LINK ->

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.6  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1.1.5    10 months ago

Absolutely,  I rank them right up there with the WHO...

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1.7  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  GregTx @1.1.6    10 months ago

Well, if the Mayo Clinic isn't good enough, I'm glad I'll never step foot in the USA again.

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
1.1.8  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1.1.7    10 months ago

Probably better off that way.. 

jrSmiley_123_smiley_image.gif

 
 
 
shona1
Professor Quiet
1.1.9  shona1  replied to  GregTx @1.1.8    10 months ago

Arvo greg...well I still wear my mask here..and I have had my 5th vaccination...

I would be a prime candidate for covid with multiple myeloma and immune compremised...

So far touch wood I have avoided it and I have been in and out of hospital, an op 6 weeks ago and having to visit my mum who is in hospital at the moment..

Is it luck or wearing a face mask don't know but everyone else around me has caught it..the only three people I know who haven't had covid my mum, brother and I and we all wear face masks...

Still have to wear face masks in hospitals and aged care homes here but not in doctor's surgery's which I think is crazy... regardless I am still wearing mine and happy to do it.

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1.10  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  shona1 @1.1.9    10 months ago

You're smart.  Better to be safe than sorry.  The anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers will deserve what can happen to them, but I feel sorry for those they infect. 

 
 
 
Greg Jones
Professor Participates
1.1.11  Greg Jones  replied to  Buzz of the Orient @1.1.7    10 months ago

Right, you're so much better off where you are.

 
 
 
Buzz of the Orient
Professor Expert
1.1.12  Buzz of the Orient  replied to  Greg Jones @1.1.11    10 months ago

I feel an awful lot safer where I am - at least no way I'm going to get shot. 

 
 
 
Gazoo
Junior Silent
2  Gazoo    10 months ago

I know this is satire but i wouldn’t be surprised if this part “ "As soon as the election is over next fall, the next pandemic will subside,,,,,” becomes reality.

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
2.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Gazoo @2    10 months ago

Absofuckingluteluy...

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
2.2  Texan1211  replied to  Gazoo @2    10 months ago

Wouldn't surprise me in the least.

Right now, just waiting on Biden to put his special spin on it and telling us how he cured Covid.

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
2.2.1  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Texan1211 @2.2    10 months ago

And then somehow Republicans caused the new pandemic......

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
2.2.2  Texan1211  replied to  GregTx @2.2.1    10 months ago

No, it will be MAGA,  not Republicans in general. 

Joe will see to that!

 
 
 
GregTx
Professor Guide
2.2.3  seeder  GregTx  replied to  Texan1211 @2.2.2    10 months ago

I disagree, if this is any barometer, anyone perceived as conservative will be the culprit. 

 
 
 
Texan1211
Professor Principal
2.2.4  Texan1211  replied to  GregTx @2.2.3    10 months ago

You could be right!

 
 
 
Drinker of the Wry
Junior Expert
2.2.5  Drinker of the Wry  replied to  GregTx @2.2.1    10 months ago
And then somehow Republicans caused the new pandemic......

Exactly, just like they caused the 2020 pandemic by supporting the military and it's National Interagency Confederation For Biological Research at Ft. Detrick, MD.

The only mystery is how we snuck it into China.

 
 
 
Gazoo
Junior Silent
2.2.6  Gazoo  replied to  Texan1211 @2.2    10 months ago

Right now, just waiting on Biden to put his special spin on it and telling us how he cured Covid.”

i wouldn’t be surprised if this turns out to be true as well. The other day i read an article about biden asking congress for money to develop a new vaccine. And he will make getting vaccinated mandatory. I wonder if that includes all the illegals he is allowing into the country? If it’s like the last go round, then no.

 
 
 
Greg Jones
Professor Participates
2.2.7  Greg Jones  replied to  Gazoo @2.2.6    10 months ago

Joe still believes there no criminals, terrorists, or virus spreaders among all those hordes of migrants he has held open the door for.

 
 
 
Just Jim NC TttH
Professor Principal
2.3  Just Jim NC TttH  replied to  Gazoo @2    10 months ago

Prepping for absentee and massive mail in voting again to influence the election.

 
 

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