Jimmy Kimmel Ratings Soar After Debuting New Segment Where He Stands There All Sad And Cries Like A Wuss
U.S. — Ratings for Jimmy Kimmel's late-night show soared this past week after he debuted a new segment where he just stands on stage and cries like a big wuss.
Kimmel unveiled the new segment Tuesday night, when in lieu of an opening monologue, he stood there and cried like a girl.
"Oh man, this is great," said local woman Lacy Janovic as she watched Kimmel blubber away. "Is his lip quivering? Aww, look at the big baby crying for his mama! I could watch this every night."
After long being an afterthought in late-night television, Kimmel has suddenly seen millions of Americans tuning in to watch him weep like a pansy. "We've had a ten-fold surge in viewership," reported show producer Dave Campbell. "People absolutely love getting to watch Kimmel stand there like a sissy and bawl all over himself. The only issue is the tears keep washing off his blackface."
At publishing time, Stephen Colbert had also received a big ratings bump as people happily tuned in to watch him angrily scream obscenities like an impotent weakling.
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He's had to go full View co-host to save his career after the way it started:
Whenever I see Jimmy Kimmel complaining about President Trump I can't help but recall this video:
Yep. And many on the left love him
Jimmy Kimmel could be frozen in a block of ice and his monologue would still be funnier than anything the Babylon Bee has ever written.
It would be fun to see him go after the Babylon Bee, but he probably has never heard of it.
Opinions do vary....
Indeed it would, I doubt that old washed up wannabe would even know what hit him....
Only losers have heard of it and find it funny.
Real men don't find garbage like this funny.
Kimmel should cry if he wants to. He knows his country has been overrun by traitor assholes.
Real men aren't afraid to show emotions.
There are none among the traitor supporters, just a bunch of pussies - wussies.
There is a difference between showing emotions and being a pussy
Who has been charged with treason?
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Absolutely...
Yes because "PD and D" is so original every time it is used here. s/
Trump supporters don’t get to call anyone a wuss, their guy has been crying like a bitch for 78 years.
The world's whiniest little bitch pussy of them all. Traitor at that.
While still winning, hugely....
Ah but they do.
Bonus!!
Kimmels best work was on The Man Show.
I agree. Back then he was funny and did not act like a raging lunatic liberal.
I wonder if leftists ever got mad at him for his blackface skit?
Kimmel is the classic Hollywood hypocrite.
Cry Jimmy cry!